Go With the Flow:
7 Easy Steps

Go With the Flow: 7 Easy Steps

Recognize this? You’ve created the perfect peaceful morning routine. You’ve structured your mornings so that you do things that bring you calm and happiness. And then the boiler breaks down and you’re standing under an icy cold shower…

You get angry. You are disappointed, because you didn’t get to do your morning routine. You are stressed and this ruins your day because you are frustrated for the rest of the day.

Not the best way to handle things, is it? And yet if we are honest, most of us have problems like this, with things that disrupt how we like things, with people who change what we are used to, with life when it doesn’t go the way we want it to go.

No matter how much structure we create in our lives, no matter how many good habits we build, there will always be things that we cannot control — and if we let them, these things can be a huge source of anger, frustration and stress. The simple solution: learn to go with the flow.

‘Nobody knows where they will end up. As life changes direction, flow with it’
~Katrina Kaif

What is ‘flowing with it’? It’s accepting change without getting angry or frustrated. It’s taking what life gives you, rather than trying to mold life to be exactly as you want it to be. It’s making the lemonade out of lemons. Going with the universal flow is the key to your life falling into place.

Learn how to tap into your own inner flow so that you can stand up straight—either literally or figuratively—wherever life takes you. Here are seven easy steps how to do that!

Just realize that you can’t control everything

We all know this at some level, but the way we think and act and feel often contradicts this basic truth. You just can’t control everything within your own little sphere of influence. Many things are simply out of your control. In the example above, you can control your morning routine, but there will be things that happen from time to time that will make you break your routine. Someone’s sick, accident happens, phone calls come in. First step is realizing that these things will happen from time to tome. Not might happen, but will. Accept that things will happen that will affect every aspect of your life, and learn to accept that, or you will constantly be frustrated.

Become aware

You can’t change things if you’re not aware of them. Become an observer, a self-examiner. Be aware that you’re becoming upset, so that you can do something about it.


When you feel yourself getting angry or frustrated, take a deep breath. Take a few. Oxygen starts flowing through your veins, your heart calms down, and you start feeling a deep sense of peace and calm. Your busy monkey mind starts to quiet down. Practice this by itself and you’ll have come a long way already.

Get perspective

Just like in the movies: step back and zoom out. This always helps. Step back, breathe and reflect on the situation or person at hand. Is it really that bad or are you telling yourself stories that are negatively impacting your perceptions over the issue? Will this really bother you 6 months or even a year down the road? You’ll find that things aren’t as bad as you’re telling yourself they are. You’ve heard it before: ‘Don’t sweat the small stuff!’


We take ourselves and life much too seriously. Especially control freaks and perfectionists who are trying too hard. See things as funny, rather than frustrating Laugh at the absurdity of the situation. That requires a certain amount of detachment. You can laugh at the situation if you’re above it, but not within it. And that detachment is a good thing. Studies have shown that laughing is good for heart health and for your soul. You will live longer and embrace life more heart felt and light hearted.

Accept change and imperfection

When we get things the way we want to, we don’t want them to change. Keeping things constant creates stability in our lives and provides a safety zone. But things will change. That is a fact of life, so it’s best to accept change and roll with the punches. Accept that the world is constantly changing, and you are a part of that change. Embrace the newness in your life and see the positive in it. What new doors have opened up for you? What’s possible?

Enjoy life as a flow of change, chaos and beauty

Instead of striving to make changes for a perfect world, as perfection is only a myth, try seeing the world as perfect the way it is. It’s messy, chaotic, painful, sad, dirty… and completely perfect. The world is beautiful, just as it is. Life is not something static, but a flow of change, never staying the same, always getting messier and more chaotic, always beautiful. There is beauty in everything around us, if we look at it as perfect.

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How do you manage to go with the flow?
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Mirjam Stoffels

Founder of seven2success, author of ‘Daily Little Secrets to Success’ and guest blogger at TEDxRoermond, Project Eve and 365 dagen succesvol. In my mission to make seven2success the biggest platform of knowledge and inspiration for women, I want to inspire you with our content! Follow us on Facebook and Twitter! Let’s to connect! And do you want to inspire other women? Write for us!


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