Impossible People:
7 Tricks

We all know them: impossible people. Whether it’s a family member, a co-worker or (worse) your boss, highly aggressive and challenging people can turn a perfectly good day into a dramatic experience without any reason.

You can point out to them that hey are difficult and demanding, but that doesn’t get you anywhere in most cases, though. Odds are, they don’t even see a problem!

In some situations, walking away is an option, and you escape with no more than ruffled feathers. But some situations are inescapable. You can wait until the thorny personality is gone and moan ‘She’s just impossible’ to a friend of co-worker.

If you just keep letting these offensive people get to you, you’ll always be mad or annoyed. Life won’t be very good. But it’s something you can learn to deal with: begin to develop skills in practical psychology. Here are seven!

#1
Accept the situation
Just accept that impossible people exist. Fact of life and there isn’t a thing you can do about it. The first step is all about facing this reality: if you think you might be dealing with an impossible person, you’re probably right. When in doubt, proceed as instructed below.

#2
Take responsibility
Take responsibility for your part of the interaction. Animosity is created in your own heart. Even the most impossible person had a mother and was loved by somebody. Deal with your own reaction and take responsibility for it. No step is more productive. Detachment is always the best response, because if you can interact without having a reaction, you will be clear-headed enough to make progress in relating to this difficult person.

#3
It is not you, it is them
Understanding this can be surprisingly difficult, considering that impossible people have complete mastery of shifting the blame. Chances are, the more often they blame you, the more they themselves are actually at fault. Just keep in mind not to fall into the trap of blaming them. Blaming is what impossible people do, and they do it well. Instead, just face the facts objectively, for your own sake.

#4
Treat them with civility
Staying calm in the heat of the moment is paramount to your personal preservation. Whatever your feelings are, the other person will be super sensitive to your attitude and behavior, and will likely reflect it back to you. If you are rude to them, they will throw away all decorum and be rude to you too. Therefore, is on you to remain fair, impartial, and composed. This way you won’t stoop to their level or be sucked into acting the way they do.

#5
Check your own expectations
Expecting others to do as you would do is setting yourself up for disappointment and frustration. If someone causes you to feel exactly the same way every time, adjust your expectations appropriately. This way you’ll be psychologically prepared and their behavior will not catch you by surprise.

#6
Turn inwards and focus on yourself
No matter what you try, some people can still really get under our skin. It’s important that you learn how to handle your frustration when dealing with someone who annoys you. Instead of thinking about how irritating that person is, focus on why you are reacting the way you are. Sometimes what we don’t like in others is what we don’t like in ourselves. Besides, they didn’t create the button, they’re only pushing it.

#7
Create some space
If all else fails, allow some space between you and the other person. Excuse yourself and go on your way. With a bit of distance, perspective, and empathy, you may be able to come back and interact again. If not prepare to part ways forever. Whether it is a friend, a family member, a parent, or even a spouse, the time to leave will eventually manifest. Maintaining a relationship with an impossible person is, literally, impossible.

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Now I am curious…
How do you deal with difficult people in everyday life?
Simply write your tips and wisdom down in the comment box!
Thank you!

Mirjam Stoffels

Founder of seven2success, author of ‘Daily Little Secrets to Success’ and guest blogger at TEDxRoermond, Project Eve and 365 dagen succesvol. In my mission to make seven2success the biggest platform of knowledge and inspiration for women, I want to inspire you with our content! Follow us on Facebook and Twitter! Let’s to connect! And do you want to inspire other women? Write for us!